September Moment of Mindfulness

Hello Everyone,

This month’s “Moment of Mindfulness” like most critical situations unfolded within a matter of seconds. 99% of the time whenever traveling outside of the home I use my white cane to assist with navigating the environment which is now nicknamed “The Game Changer” since my reality of the World and how people interact with me is completely different as far as night and day based on whether I have it out or not. If I have “The Game Changer” unfolded people are extremely nice, accommodating, and overly sensitive to my needs such as opening doors or allowing me to have the right of way while passing. When I don’t use the white cane I get attitude, hostility, and men sometimes want to fight, “Why don’t you look where you're going!” is the typical response received if I accidentally ever happen to get to close or bump into anyone.

Just the other day while walking across the street to the local neighborhood food market, there was a group of three men approximately in their late 20’s early 30’s; standing and shooting the you know what on the corner, blocking my right of passage on the sidewalk. Although I had “The Game Changer” inside of my backpack on this particular occasion I didn’t feel the need to use it since I was only going to really quickly pick up a package of hot dog buns and return back home. As I came closer to the group of men I could hear their laughter off in the distance and knew I was approaching their proximity. Yelling out I in a joyous playful tone said, “Pardon me guys.”. “One of the men walked over towards me responding, “Yeah, excuse you.” Within a matter of split seconds I witnessed my Mind and Body shift from being calm, open and relaxed to anger, tension and irritability. My knee jerk reaction was to stand up for myself and react to his comment with further aggression especially as someone who throughout childhood often received advice from his Father, “Stand your ground.” And don’t take no shit from nobody.” Once as a child, I even witnessed good 'ol Pops enter a fist fight over a parking space inside of a crowded Fedco parking lot during the busy Christmas season.

But did I react with aggression? Everything within my Mind and Body told me to do so however I took a moment instead to pause, found my Breath, and reacted with Mindful Awareness. I walked away from the group of men, picked up the package of hot dog buns but this time while returning home I made sure to have out the “Game Changer”. I approached the group of men once again and profusely apologized for any inconvenience I may have caused. This time however the same guy that was mouthy to me earlier said out loud as I was passing, “Don’t worry about it, the World is yours, Papi! Exercising “A Moment of Mindfulness” allowed for me to completely change the trajectory of what may have happened. ”

Just Be & Be Well,

Eric Cooley, MSW, TMF

Mindful Awareness

"Mindful awareness" refers to a state of focused and non-judgmental attention to the present moment. It's a fundamental concept in mindfulness practices and involves paying deliberate attention to your thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and the environment without getting caught up in judgments or reactions.

Here are some key elements of mindful awareness:

1. Present Moment Focus: Mindful awareness emphasizes being fully present in the here and now. It involves directing your attention to whatever is happening at the present moment, whether it's your breath, sensations in your body, your thoughts, or your surroundings.

2. Non-Judgmental Observation: In mindful awareness, you observe your experiences without judgment or criticism. You neither label them as "good" nor "bad." Instead, you accept them as they are, recognizing that they are part of the human experience.

3. Open and Curious Attitude: A mindful awareness practice encourages an open and curious attitude. Rather than trying to change or fix your experiences, you explore them with a sense of curiosity, as if you were observing them for the first time.

4. Acceptance and Compassion: Mindful awareness involves self-compassion and self-acceptance. You treat yourself with kindness and understanding, acknowledging that it's okay to have various thoughts and feelings.

5. Reduced Reactivity: By cultivating mindful awareness, you become less reactive to your thoughts and emotions. You create a space between your experiences and your reactions, allowing you to respond more thoughtfully and intentionally to life's challenges.

6. Enhanced Focus and Clarity: Mindful awareness can improve your ability to concentrate and make clear decisions. It can also help you gain insights into your thought patterns and emotional responses.

Mindful awareness is often developed through mindfulness meditation practices, where individuals engage in exercises that train their attention and awareness. However, it's not limited to meditation and can be integrated into everyday life. The goal of mindful awareness is to cultivate a more mindful and balanced approach to living, which can lead to greater emotional well-being and a deeper understanding of oneself.

The RAINS Practice

The "RAINS" practice is a mindfulness and self-compassion technique that can help individuals navigate difficult emotions and challenging situations. It is an acronym that stands for:

1. Recognize: This step involves acknowledging and recognizing the emotions or thoughts you are experiencing. It's about becoming aware of what is happening within you without judgment or criticism. This is the first and crucial step in addressing and managing your emotions effectively.

2. Allow: In this step, you allow the emotions or thoughts to be present without trying to suppress or deny them. Instead of resisting or fighting against what you're feeling, you create a space for these emotions to exist without judgment. Allowing them to be there can be a powerful way to process and understand them better.

3. Investigate: Once you've recognized and allowed your emotions or thoughts, you investigate them more deeply. This involves exploring the root causes, triggers, and physical sensations associated with these emotions. It's about gaining insight into why you're feeling a certain way and what might be driving those feelings.

4. Non-Identification (or Non-attachment): This step is about recognizing that you are not defined by your emotions or thoughts. You separate your sense of self from these passing mental states. By doing so, you can cultivate a greater sense of detachment and resilience, allowing you to respond to challenging situations with more clarity and composure.

5. Self-Compassion: The "S" in RAINS can also stand for "Self-Compassion." In this context, it means offering yourself kindness and understanding as you navigate difficult emotions. Treat yourself with the same care and empathy that you would offer to a friend going through a tough time.

The RAINS practice is a versatile tool that can be used in various situations to promote emotional awareness, self-compassion, and effective coping with challenging emotions. It's often used in mindfulness and meditation practices to help individuals develop emotional intelligence and better manage their inner experiences.